In our time, when one of the most important qualities is the ability to put a smile in every situation for the next photos in the social network, decided not to discuss fears or bad mood. It all goes under the logo «negative». The world is ruled by «positive» that generate likes on the Internet and the office. If you have a feeling of hopelessness and you say, scared to ride the subway after the next terrorist attack you know who, is a «negative», and in the best case, the source of the negativity will advise you to go to a therapist, and at worst, they laugh at him and condescending Pat on the shoulder.
That is, as if people must always be “positive”, people don’t have nightmares, people are not afraid of death, and people are always cheerful, despite the current currency rate and world events.
Haig says openly: “Guys, it’s not. It is not, though, because to me personally it is not. I have experienced depression, panic attacks and the desire to throw myself off a cliff. To fear is normal.” And that’s what is so lacking in our modern opinion makers–opinion leaders, actors and pop stars. Because with depression are not only losers or people in debt. It also affects anyone, whether a successful actor/actress, singers or models.
The problem is that the General public know about depression specifically this famous person after he/she took/and radical decision and committed a suicide. Last sensational case which I remember is the suicide of Robin Williams.
Haig writes that it is wrong to blame people suffering from depression and who decided on this step. No one suddenly ceases to fear death. Just have the question, what is more intolerable is to live or to die. Matt chose to live, and in the book he describes what happened to him and what helped him overcome depression.
“Reasons to Stay Alive” is a blend of autobiography, advice and research data on depression and anxiety disorders, which turned out to be surprisingly fun. The author alternates between stories about themselves, about their state after graduation, when the question arose of how to provide yourself with tips that personally helped him and can help others. All this diluted the statistical data and scientific concepts.
Haig refers to books that helped him understand the issue, and I’ve made a few to your list to read. The author’s approach to solving his problem is not based on tablets and on religion, which in my opinion is infinitely valuable, because this approach is more universal. In particular, Matt writes directly that never took antidepressants (although the anxiety disorders have tried to take medication). So what helped him to get out of this sticky state of despair and the suction of the black hole called depression and, when you do not see the point to even get out of bed?
Everything is quite simple.
– sports: Matt helped running and yoga;
– healthy eating: alcohol is not a friend but an enemy, he merely creates an illusion, as if everything has resolved itself, until it was morning of the next day;
– support the family and his girlfriend.
The last point is in my opinion extremely important. The presence of loved ones who understand you, most likely means that, before extreme measures will not come. Especially Matt got lucky with a girl. She took care of all the household issues, she lived with him at his parents, helped him in difficult moments and encouraged him to do more, for example, to go to the supermarket (Yes, this may be difficult).
Without its support, judging by the description of the author, it’s hard to believe that he would get out of his condition. This is important because somehow depression is something that can pass, if just a strong desire. Phrases like “come on, let’s get it together!” or “let’s go, we’ll chill, you’ll feel better” for some reason, you can say to someone suffering from depression, but you can’t say to the person with TB is as finely observed by the author. Although both included in the list of recognized diseases, and is not the whim of a particular person.
This is also important because particularly in our society, men should always present a confident and courageous face to the world, and if suddenly on the face seem the tears, the reaction of others can be very different, from finger pointing to laughter. Needless to say, many times, Haig described how he suddenly started to cry? Not worth it. A lot. And that’s fine.
Depression and anxiety disorder is not a choice. To cry is normal. For men And women. It is abnormal to expect from a man of any behavior based on their biological sex. Therefore, it is also important that Haig admits that Andrea (his girlfriend) really helped him and saved his life, and not because she is a woman and “should” bring him tea and take care of him, but because they’re partners and all the difficulties overcome together.
In this site you can free download the e-book «Reasons to Stay Alive» by Matt Haig in ePub, fb2 or Read Online.
Overall, the book is recommended reading for all interested parties, in addition to the history of the successful fight against depression and anxiety, it is just interesting to read. By the way, it has tips not only for those who suffer from depression, but their family and friends.